My Increasing Passion For College Football....Genetics??

Growing up, I hated football. I knew that on Saturdays from early September until late November my house would be complete chaos. Screaming, yelling, cussing, and lots and lots of clapping. I once even saw a chair being flung through the back door into the yard. My Dad would get up on Saturdays, put on a maroon sweatsuit and a trucker hat (they were NOT popular back then) with the Alabama "A" on it and proceed to sit there for 12 to 14 hours. Now, this was before the specialty sports channels became so popular, so sometimes he would also have the radio on. I hated it. I was completely ignored and most of the time just a nuisance unless I was bringing him another beer or bag of chips.

In 8th grade, my dad came to watch me "cheer". I can remember us doing a cheer that went.."1st and 10, do it again...move that ball". Well, we did this cheer after a 3rd down play....and our team was playing defense. I know.... Anyway, for the next two weeks I was given a very in depth and thorough explanation of how the game of football was played. Point being, I learned the game of football very young.

This erratic and completely ridiculous behavior also hit me from my Mothers side of the family. My Uncle Bo is as much if not maybe a tiny bit more annoying during a football game than my Dad was. He too is a die hard Alabama fan. Rumor has it, my Dad and Uncle Bo had many a "good" time watching Alabama play football, even after my mom and dad divorced.

All this being said, I have always LIKED football. I love the band, the smell of popcorn and that crisp fall weather. I went to most all of my college games at Ga. Southern and thanks to my 8th grade lesson, followed along with what was going on much better than any other girls I knew. A few years ago I caught myself flipping through the channels on Saturday and STOPPING on ESPN Game Day. It started out as just something to listen to as I did housework or laundry. Over the years it has progressed into...well...erratic and completely ridiculous behavior. I think I am about another two seasons away from body paint. It's not just college, it's high school too. I don't see any other mothers standing up in the stands screaming "Holding? Open you eyes Ref!!!". And I don't even have any kids that play. I also have that very loud impromptu clap that my Dad and uncle Bo have. You don't know when it's coming, it just happens. Could be one or even two claps, but not continuous. I have also inherited the "Stand up Sit Down" action. This behavior is also unforeseen and could happen at any moment. Example:



Something good happens, you stand up, then jump, giving two maybe three big claps and a "Yeah Baby! Whooooohhh".

Something almost good happens, you stand up and then sit down quickly, but shout something like "dumb ass, catch the damn ball".

Something bad happens, you stand up, then shout...well something bad and sit down firmly in a pouty kind of way.

Something almost bad happens, you stand up, clap several times, and sit down.



Lucky for me I have very close family in Tuscaloosa. Games are easily accessible and I always have somewhere to stay. It's great!

We (Bama Folks) have a very big game this weekend. In preparation of this event, I have purchased a new shirt, little "A" face tattoos and a new car flag. Baby daddy and I will be going to Atlanta to watch the game since we can't afford the $1000 to actually go to the game. I wonder... now since my inner annoying football fan behavior has reared it's head, what would my dad and I be like at an Alabama Game? I guess God knows what he's doing. He decided to spare all of you and wait until Dad was watching from above to bring out my inner fan!

"Sure I'd like to beat Notre Dame, don't get me wrong. But nothing matters more than beating that cow college on the other side of the state." Paul Bear Bryant
To a group of boosters before an Auburn game. This comment was widely reported, and Auburn upset the Tide a few days later.

ROLL TIDE!!

I'm Cooler Than This.....

About a year ago, corporate decided that the customer services managers should have "offices". Well, in order to do this they had to take the accounting offices away and put up panels. This is a souped up version of a CUBICLE. We fought it for about a month, but ultimately lost in the end. After having a private office for so long the noise level was just unbearable. I am easily annoyed anyway, but the little noises that people make were making me insane. Clicking of keyboards, hearing other people's conversations, rattling of change in pockets, that clicking noise people make with their mouths when "thinking". I couldn't stand it. The only solution I could come up with, was the purchase of a pair of headphones. So, I got myself a little 2G MP3 player. I downloaded the software and began searching song choices, playlists, albums, whatever.... I brought it to work the next day and as soon as I heard something annoying, I put them on. WOW!!! I was in my on little world. I became quite the guru with my new toy. For my daughters 7th birthday, I bought her an IPOD Nano and downloaded all of "her" music onto it. She listened to it all summer, taking it with her where ever we went. Well, when school started back a few weeks ago, I sort of....well....took her IPOD. It was laying on the counter in the kitchen and had been for 2 weeks untouched, so I figured that she wouldn't miss it anyway. The sound on this thing is ssooooo much better than mine. The screen is bigger, it has little pop up things, it can hold pictures, etc... It's COOL!!!
I have now downloaded all of my music on her IPOD and as soon as I get to work in the morning I put my headphones on and go into my own little world of Journey, Rod Stewart, Poison, Pearl Jam, Pink Floyd and most recently.....Rihanna, Jesse McCartney, Flo Rida, Jordin Sparks, and my favorite right now....Kardinal Offishall's "Dangerous". By lunch I feel like a Solid Gold dancer. My co workers concerns of my unstable mental state has now been confirmed. I can actual dance now in my chair while typing. Now I know why Ellen DeGeneres dances before every show...ITS FUN!!!! I love music, it can take you back to places in your mind that have long been filed away or bring you right back up to current time in seconds. Because of my recent discovery of just how cool I am, I began taking a Hip Hop dance class on Thursday nights when Bryleigh is in Gymnastics at the Arts Guild. It is 6 other women that are about my same age that too have recently realized how cool they are, in spite of what our kids say. It is great exercise and OH SO MUCH FUN!!
You might be wondering how I can concentrate on generating financial statements while listening to "...throw your hands in the Ayer, Ayer, Ayer" but it actually helps me concentrate. Maybe I'm just good at multi-tasking, or my job has now become so monotonus that I don't really have to think anymore. The only bad thing about this is that you ocassionally get interupted. If I am really into the song, and have a good flow going, it brings me out of "Ashleyville". Which is not good.
So, if you are like me and need to "get away" from your surroundings, I highly suggest this purchase. You too could find your inner coolness....put on a pair of headphones and dance like no one is watching!!!

Family Tree Project, It's a Learning Experience, NOT A COMPETITION!

As you might notice, one of my top 10 dislikes and or inconveniences are "La La Poo Poo Mothers". First, let me explain exactly what a "LLPPM" is. Unlike myself, they are non working, very wealthy, very pretty, mothers with nothing but time on their hands. They have all the time in the world to do....whatever.... They rear their ugly heads at various times in order to (I believe) make us working mothers feel more horrible and guilty about ourselves than we already do. They are the ones that give birthday parties at 3:30 pm on a Tuesday afternoon because it's more convenient. TO WHO!!!
You always know who the working mothers kids are because they are always catching a ride with the "LLPPM". For instance, my daughters Brownie troop meets every other Tuesday at 3:30 at the Presbyterian Church and of course she always has to ride with the troop leader. When I pick her up, I'm always greeted by the Leader of the "LLPPM" who will remain nameless with a... "You look pretty today, I can't imagine having to get dressed up like that everyday". Is that suppose to be a compliment? Once while picking Bryleigh up from a birthday party, I was approached by one of the "LLPPM" and she asked me if that was my mother that ALWAYS had Bryleigh. GOD!!! I have managed to stay as involved as I possibly can, keeping up pretty well with them. Volunteering as story mom, being cookie manager for the brownie troop, and creating pretty cool Valentine's and Christmas presents. But this past week, I realized that no matter what, I am just not going to be able to keep up. And I realized why. I DON'T CARE!
Word for word this is what the project request was "We would like for you to help your child crate a Family Tree. This will help the students see how families are different. Please allow the students to list parents, siblings (brothers and sisters) as well as their grandparents (mom's and dad's parents only). If they would like to include great-grandparents that is fine also, it is their choice. They may use anything they wish to create this and then share it with the class. As you are going over the family with the child please also help them fill in the blanks for the attached sheet. This will help them tell the story of their family and will help us to compare and contrast the families in the classroom-there are different cultures represented in the classroom and this is a great way to show how they can differ! This is a great learning opportunity for all of us. Thank you for your guidance and support!"
Bryleigh and I began work on this immediately. I let HER go through albums and pick the pictures she wanted. She picked this GREAT one of my mom and dad. My mom had that really really big hair and my dad had one of those really puffy 70's porno mustaches. She picked a picture of granny and grandpa Frazier at their 25th wedding anniversary and one of granny pib and pa at the beach. She also picked out pictures of Roger's family and we attached them to the poster board. We had long conversations about why Papa hill wasn't anywhere on the tree and where her grandpa David was. It was very cool. We ended up putting papa hill as an honorary mention in the right hand corner. Her idea, I thought it was pretty cute. We drew with green marker leaves and then put a big picture of her and Jaxon at the trunk of the tree. I let her write the names of each of the family members and of course her name was in big glitter letters. I thought it looked great. We filled out the attached worksheet and I let her put on there whatever she wanted. It asked questions like "Where does your family like to shop?" Bryleigh..."The Mall". "Where does your family buy clothes"..Bryleigh..."K-mart"..."Why?" Bryleigh..."Because they have good clothes".
So, we get out of the car the next morning to take it into school and she walked with it so proudly through the hall way, and then we turned the corner to her classroom and I could see the embarrassment on her face. There were family trees that looked like something out of the damn Smithsonian. One was an actual Ficus tree with laminated pictures and calligraphy writing on it. One was set up in a tri fold pattern with those frames attached that show pictures in a slide show. There was one trimmed with green fur from a boa, one with a pedestal, and another with actual leaves and bark attached to the poster board. Bryleigh looked at me, then at her poster board and said "Why didn't we do all that". I said "Honey, I promise that you learned more and had more fun than anyone else in your classroom doing this project, we didn't have to put fur, or leaves or spend a ton of money on it to make ours look the best. These people had to put all that extra stuff on it, because their families aren't as great as ours. YOU did yours just like you were suppose to and you should be very proud to show it off." She kind of shrugged her shoulders and took her poster board and propped it up against the base of the Ficus tree. I just winked at her and left.
When I got back to the van I sat there and had a pity party for about 10 minutes until I realized that what I had told her was completely true. I promise no one else had as great a time as we did. And I think it is sad that these mothers took such a wonderful opportunity to spend time with their children and turned it into another "LLPPM" competition. The family trees will be displayed at Open House this coming Tuesday and I am going to brag and brag on Bryleighs in my loudest Bartow voice I can, so everyone can hear me!!!

Proud Potty!!!

Never in my wildest dreams would I picture myself installing a toilet, or toilet parts for that matter. It's amazing what you will do when you realize that it's yours now. Even though you know that many people before you crapped in your crapper, it really didn't make any difference. It's now MY crapper!
In a desperate attempt to stay on my completion schedule, I was forced into fixing the upstairs toilet. After realizing that all the parts in the kit I purchased didn't fit a 1975 toilet, I had to go to the downstairs toilet to "borrow" parts. Now, this is not a bathroom that has been in operation yet, so it's...well.....gross. I think my 7 year old daughter actually gagged a few times while I was borrowing these parts, but it taught her a good lesson. WE CAN DO ANYTHING!!! I am woman hear me roar, or scream, whatever... Well, after a couple of hours, the toilet was fixed and now my master bath is in complete working order!!! YEAH!
However, this opened up a new and quite pressing problem. The toilet that I borrowed the parts from was shot. I have had a brand new toilet, with all the bells and whistles sitting in the garage for about a month now waiting on baby daddy (this is how he is referred to, because I am not likely at this point to take a husband) to install it. Since he was upstairs installing carpet, I thought I would give it a shot. It's really quite easy, the installation I mean. Now the removal of the old toilet is not so easy and is in so many words, NASTY! There was this wax ring do hickey that goes around the base of the toilet that had obviously been there since 1970. It took 6 pairs of rubber gloves and an entire roll of paper towels, but I managed to get it up. Since, I had made myself so familiar with the tank guts from the earlier installation this one went quite smoothly. Plus, it was manufactured after World War II, so everything fit very nicely. Then ta-da a brand new twallet! I stunk and looked like hell, but damn-it I had not one, but 2 fully functional crappers!
I gave myself a pat on the back and nodded up to my dad thanking him for his constant reminder growing up that I "can't depend on anyone but myself". That has always held true.... So, this toilets for you dad, even though I rolled my eyes EVERY TIME you said it, I really was listening.

I Survived Another One!!

For whatever reason, I tend to go way way overboard with the kids birthday parties. I don't mean financially (I'm really cheap), I just mean, making sure that they have the coolest, never before seen (or tried), most unique birthday parties. I mean, this is in fact the day of their birth! That's a big deal. I still make my own birthday a big deal, even if no one else does. I make sure that everyone in my office, everyone at home (including the kids) know without a shadow of a doubt it is my birthday. I know as I get older that might change, but I seriously doubt it.

I have managed up until now to avoid the ho hum trendy themes, like Strawberry Shortcake, Dora the Explorer, or God forbid Barney. But this year my 6 soon to be 7 year old insisted on a High School Musical themed party. I had no idea how I was going to pull this one off. How do you make such a common popular theme unique? This is why I start asking questions months ahead of the event, because I needed time to mull this one over. As I started thinking about it, I kind of got excited myself. I love those stupid songs. I know the words to them better than my 6 year old. When I picked her up on the last day of school, I sang "What time is it?" until I embarrassed her so bad, she walked to the van under her book bag. We decided to have the party at the local roller rink, so we could play the music she wanted, without the neighbors complaining. They offered a "private" party option, but of course I am too cheap for that and decided to have the party right when the place opened at 12 noon, knowing that no one would be there then anyway.

I always bake my own birthday cakes. Mainly because it's cheaper, but you can also do some really cool stuff to a birthday cake if you just use your imagination. I looked around on the Internet and found a 6" rotating disco ball with a stand for $4.99. PERFECT!

Because her birthday is right in the middle of summer, people are usually on vacation or too busy to remember a birthday party, but this year we had a pretty good turn out. We had a blast! They even had size 7 roller skates for my soon to be 2 year old son, who I couple skated with to "You Are The Music In Me". I only have about 3 1/2 months until his birthday, and I hope it goes as well as hers did.

I asked her 4 or 5 times that day if she was sure she was turning 7 and not 4, because it seems IMPOSSIBLE for her to be that old. I hope I can still pull this off when she turns 16.

Goodbye Peter!!!

On Tuesday of last week, I received an email from Elizabeth Roles (our asst. rector at St. Mark's) with the subject "Parish Notice". I know when I receive this email that someone in the church has past. Usually it's an older member of the church that was knocking on heaven's door pretty hard anyway. When I opened the email, it said, "Peter Bouldin Andersen" died this morning in Dalton. I was heartbroken.
I left work immediately and went to pick up my children. I guess just to hug them and know they were still there. Bryleigh and Peter were pretty tight. Even though they were two grades apart, they still shared choir, Christmas pageants and any church youth activity together. They also went to the same school and saw each other at lunch and recess. I have really tried to raise Bryleigh "color blind". By this, I mean I never bring up color, disability, or any other handicap to her when we meet a new person unless she asks. Surprisingly when we joined St. Mark's she didn't even ask me about Peter, or his disability. She just saw him as a kid who gets to ride around in a "sit up" bicycle and she didn't. Peter would ride all of the kids around on the back of his wheelchair, which of course they loved! He could maneuver this thing better than I can walk! No one ever worried about how he was going to get from point A to B, we knew he could do it.
I was unbelievably grief stricken by his passing. He wasn't expected to live a week when he was born, but made it almost 10 years. His parents made an overwhelming effort to get done WHATEVER needed to get done in order to make his short life as normal as possible. He played sports, went to the beach, played the head of the donkey in this years Christmas pageant and co-piloted a plane. He was funny, smart, and so appreciative of life. I struggled until Thursday with the words to use to tell Bryleigh that her friend was gone. Because Bryleigh always saw Peter as "normal", she didn't really know he was sick. I began the conversation by telling her about "why" he was in the wheelchair. Muscular Dystrophy is a difficult concept for a 7 year old. After consoling her for a few moments, she looked up at me and said, "Well, at least Bear will have someone to run around and play with now". I wanted to break down and cry, but I waited until she went back outside.
Elizabeth did an unbelievable job at the burial service. This is her second parish death since Dean our rector has been on sabbatical. I am amazed by her strength and leadership in her role as "Priest In Charge". This week is VBS. I know it is hard on the kids, not having Peter there to ride them up and down the halls as he has done in years past, but I know that we are all better people to have know such an amazing 9 year old.
LOVE YOU PETER!!! MISS YOU VERY MUCH

Could I live without daily drama?

So, I'm in Lowe's yesterday picking up paint as usual and notice that there is a "new" guy mixing my paint. Normally it's this really nice older lady named Nancy that I have become to adore and trust through my remodeling fiasco. While my paint is mixing I usually stick around and talk to Nancy about various finishes, colors, whatever.... Since Nancy wasn't in yesterday, I decided to roam around the store to pick up several more things. I have Bryleigh and Halle with me, so in order to keep them focused and not annoy me, we go to the ceiling fan section. I don't know why, but they love looking at the ceiling fans.

This is right after work, so I am still in my work clothes. Slacks, dress shirt, and my adorable, most favorite, comfortable, black heels that I splurged on at Christmas and purchased myself. I NEVER spend more than $20-$30 on shoes, but I loved these shoes and they had them on sale at Macy's at the time so I decided to get them. I paid $120 for them on sale, but I have definitely gotten the wear out of them.

After I convince the girls that spending $299 on a surf board ceiling fan is not an option for them, we head back over to the paint counter to pick up the paint. Let me emphasize Pick Up the paint. It is sitting on the counter ready to go. I check the color and tell the new guy thanks. As I am turning around the bottom of the paint can hits the side of the buggy and bright yellow paint (in slow motion) pours down the entire right side of my body, down into my shoe and onto the floor. As I stand there in amazement, I hear Halle say "Oh Lord!, those were my favorite shoes". I turn around and tell the guy "You didn't hammer the lid on the paint, did you?" His response was "Oh no, what have I done".

He comes over and starts cleaning the paint up off of the FLOOR!! Yes the FLOOR! I immediately start running around trying to find something to get the paint off of my shoe. I find a bottle of Goof Off and just open the bottle and start scrubbing. By this point the store manager and several other store employees (as well as a small crowd of customers) came over to help. I am almost in tears, but since the kids are with me, I try to keep it together as much as I can. As I sit on the counter of the Lowe's paint center watching the chaos, I wonder....when did I become so material? I'm like Carrie Bradshaw in that episode where her girlfriend makes her take her shoes off to come in the house and then her friend loses them... It's crazy! Was it what I paid for the shoes that is getting me so upset, or the fact that I had them broken in and now I'm going to have to do that all over again? The store manager said to bring in the receipt for shoes and new pants and she would happily reimburse me. However, I know that I'm not going to find those same shoes again and I know that it's going to take at least 3 or 4 months to get them back to the same comfort level. It's quite silly actually, but it all comes back to "I'm being Inconvenienced". Just a simple tap of a hammer, two seconds worth of work could have avoided hours, weeks and months of me being inconvenienced.

But today all I can think about is that poor guy. How humiliating it must have been. New on the job, probably trying his best (at least that is what I keep telling myself) to make a good impression, and me....acting like I had lost a precious possession. What if he has a family to support? What if he had tried to get that job for months and now he gets shipped back to the lumber department because he made a mistake. I would feel terrible.

I guess this was just God's way of saying...."Hello, Ashley....there are things more important than shoes and pants" So, today as I wear my old brown heels, I am happy to have them and happy that I have feet to put them on and a job to wear them to.

My Magnolia Tree HAS to GO!

As if I don't have enough to worry about inside the house, I have this HUGE Magnolia tree in my front yard that I have grown to hate.

Growing up in the south I am very used to seeing Magnolia Trees and both of my grandmothers loved them. I can remember both of my grandmothers cutting branches of blooms off of their tree and displaying them on the kitchen table. I remember them being very big beautiful flowers that looked like huge cotton balls in a vase. My aunt Kaye actually bought my granny pib a tree for Mother's Day one year and we all planted it in the front yard, because she wanted another one. WHAT! I hate this thing. It has very large pine cone looking things that fall off of it everyday, it's tearing up my brand new lawnmower, and from what I hear, when the weather gets warmer all of those big leaves are going to fall off and clutter my lawn. Which by the way aren't your average dead leaves. It is also blocking my entire view of the city from my front yard. Everyone thinks I'm crazy because it's shading the house, but Saturday I randomly went outside throughout the day to see just how much shade this "thing" was providing me and from what I can see, it's not doing me any good.

I read an article on the internet today that says to watch out for hornets in the spring, because they love to build hive's in Magnolia trees. If anyone has Magnolia tree advice and/or comments, I would love to hear them, because as of right now it's coming down.

Is Everything in life this tiring?

I'm tired. I shouldn't be. I should be on top of the world! I can at last mark homeownership off of my to do list.

My first house! Yippy. I am hoplessly in love with this house. It is everything I have ever wanted. However, it hasn't been updated since....well....1970?? I don't want to take time off of work...I can't take time off of work. It's the end of fiscal Q1. I have a Q to file, I have accruals to adjust, I have Canadians to deal with. BUT MY HOUSE!!! I leave work everyday at hopefully around 6 pm or so, go pick up the kids and then usually head to either Home Depot or Lowes. I Love Love Love Love Home Improvement Stores. I had no idea this stuff existed. They actually make dry erase marker board PAINT! Anyway, after drive thru dinner and eating in the car, we get to the house around 7. I have about 2 hours to work on it. I have stripped more wallpaper in the past two weeks than most people do in a lifetime. But I am so determined to get this done. It's the hardest most exciting work I have ever done.

I am staying in my apartment until the end of May to get the house ready, so I have plenty of time, but it's just the principle. It's my house! I want to live there....NOW. I get the kids and myself back to the apartment around 9. Just enough time to get them bathed and in the bed. Then my usual chores start, laundry, bottles, whatever....Then it's off to bed at around 12. I am up again at 6:30 and start all over again.

I just try to keep telling myself that it is only temporary and it is going to be so worth it. But I AM SOOO TIRED!

Blogging for Therapy

I have attempted for many years to write in a journal. Every therapist I've ever had (too many to mention) highly recommend this from of "therapy". However, I'm not patient enough to write. I think faster than I can write and it's annoying.

After my aunt from New York came for a visit in my quaint little town, I decided to check out her blog and thought...now that is therapy. She is actually sharing her thoughts and frustrations with; well...everyone. This is actually a great idea. No, it's not private, but you get OPINIONS. People that actually feel, or don't feel, the same way. It's no mystery that misery loves company, so what better way than recruit the whole world into your life!

So, beginning today.....I am blogging for therapy.